Emotional Maturation vs Cluelessness

This article took me a long time to write, and it is so-so... It"s a difficult topic... It"s about being Clueless. The why and the how and the "now what?" And the WTF...

Once a coach of mine said: "you don"t have to be more than 5% better than others to stand out... and become a winner." He also said: "You Don’t have to get it right, you just have to get it going."

You don"t think you are clueless... You say you are confused, you don"t understand, you didn"t hear it... but clueless? No, that you don"t even consider.

But we, all of humanity are clueless... with some clues that are lead us to pay attention to what we know, and not to worry about what we don"t. And this is true across all strata of humanity, including scientists, smart people, ignorant people... everyone.

Why?

Your level of cluelessness is inversely correlated with your level of awareness, self-awareness, and reality-awareness. Your awareness of reality. And your awareness depends on the size of your cone of vision and on your about-me score. And, not in the least, on your ability to tell reality from unreality, made up, mind stuff.

To be aware you need to be in the present moment, you need to have a wide cone of vision, and you need distinctions. You need to be at least somewhat astute... know if something is real or not... because looking at something you can"t recognize but is similar, for example, won"t make it the same as what you think you know... you misjudge things. That cannot be called awareness... can it? I call that, in my Starting Point Measures, delusion...

The opposite of awareness is not unawareness: it is delusion.

As someone with dyslexia I deal with mis-seeing things... but you don"t have to be dyslexic to see things that aren"t there, and not see things that are there. To live out of your own interpretations, as if it were reality.

When I was 28 years old my much older boy friend sat me down one evening and said that we needed to talk. He started to teach me about men. He taught me that men, when they walk or drive you home and ask if they can come up for a cup of coffee, they don"t mean coffee, they mean sex.

I was mortified, dumbfounded, because I"d never known that, and I had been wondering why I had to get better and better fighting off men who wanted to have sex, in spite of the fact that I had no intention and no indication that I wanted to have sex.

I had myself as the alpha and the omega of things... and I assumed that everyone was like me. They weren"t.

I was clueless about people.

I was plain spoken, straight as an arrow, I said what I meant. It never occurred to me that other people would be different. That people would lie, use each other, borrow money they don"t intend to pay back, pretend that you are friends while they destroy your reputation, come to a party in your house and steal, compete with you... etc.

I didn"t know any that. When things happened, I never made the correct conclusion, that it is just human nature. I thought it was a bad individual. So I was really clueless.

I also didn"t understand why so many people didn"t trust me: I have learned since that it takes one to know one. The saying may be true but it seems to be quite true about bad things.

So from age 28 till now, 43 years have passed and I have been educating myself. And yet, I am still surprised when I stumble on total cluelessness, mine or yours.

One way to be clueless like I was: innocent and therefore ignorant.

Wanting love, wanting to be useful... and attracting all the users... and crying foul.

Another way is to be someone with a hidden agenda, not expecting other people to be just like you... with an agenda.

All agenda is desire to receive for the self alone: dupe another person, and gain power over them. Borrow their money, their umbrella, and then complain when they want it back...

Or lend them money with the expectation (expectation is the politically correct name of an agenda!) that they will love you forever... Instead they will pay your money back, or give you a lot of politically correct reasons to complain, to gossip, to be angry, to feel cheated, slighted, superior, etc. But they won"t love you, they won"t be a good friend to you... That is not how life works. That is not how human nature works.

On growing up...

One of the signs of growing up, of maturity should be that you know that people are individuals, dealing with their own issues that are different from yours. And no love or like for a reason is lasting or real.

Judging from behaviors I can observe, maturation doesn"t finish till around age 26, maybe even later. and if you didn"t have a friend like I did... it may never comes. I was 28... a late bloomer.

Little kids cannot see anything from another vantage point than where their eyes physically are. Or walk in another"s shoes, not literally, of course. Not many people acquire this mature, this adult capacity, and suffer for it.

Ultimately, the ability and willingness to take responsibility for your behavior, your actions, for the consequences is part of becoming mature.

Mature isn"t old... it means to be in the possession and be able access your adult capacities.

I measure that in my Starting Point Measurements ((19. To what degree you have access to your adult capacities 3%)) .

That measure pretty much gives me the big picture about you and tells me a whole lot about your upbringing, and your abilities. Men have a higher number than women in having access to their adult capacities: women are trained by society to defer a lot to men.

Clueless is a person whose maturity level is low, whose access to their adult capacities is low, whose emotional intelligence is low. Virtually all people.

Emotional immaturity vs emotional maturity is a big topic, and there are thousands of books, articles, theses published about it.

In my programs I work with you to make you emotionally mature, because there is no spiritual maturity without emotional maturity... and you signed up with me to raise your vibration... And raising your vibration is a spiritual matter.

It"s a lot of work: no one course will be able to cause it all. Why? Because you can only act and practice what you can see... and the veil lifts only slowly, gradually, because you need to be able to see your own shortcomings, your own desire to receive for the self alone, your own delusions, and own them, before you can benefit from seeing reality fully.

Seeing yourself, the way you are, with sober eyes, without condemnation, regret, guilt, shame, is beyond where you are now... Let alone embracing, owning the stuff that you"d rather not have, or you"d rather keep but lie about.

It took me 10 years to declare myself stupid (stupid as the stupid does, not a lack of mental capacity!) and start my journey, in earnest.

Warning:

You and I live in a world of emotionally, intellectually, socially immature people. This includes your parents, your peers, your children, your teachers, your gurus, your PhD"s, politicians, do-gooders, doctors, everyone.

You will not get any or much support from them, because your attempts at learning to become mature will trigger their crab bucket reflex. So I recommend that you learn to become mature as a self-study.

Obviously you will need to have a certain level of maturity already, to be able to keep your mouth shut. Certain soul corrections cannot keep their mouth shut... If your soul correction whispers to you that you are superior, that you should lead or teach others, you"ll talk, and never grow, never learn.

Each and every soul correction deals with one main and a few secondary lack of emotional maturity issues.

Lack of trust, lack of initiative, lack of astuteness about yourself, lack of proactivity (lacking "the sight", i.e. seeing the consequences of your actions), lack of self-discipline, lack of choosing your context, lack of inner directedness, lack of seeing the big picture, lack of connection, lack of the willingness to stand alone, lack of the ability to let the past be the past... etc.

All children lack those...

Here is an extreme example: you act as if you were a psychopath... Psychopaths can"t feel pain, can"t feel guilt, and can"t learn from experience.

When you start feeling bad about your faults, that"s when I start having hopes for you ever becoming mature, ever be able to learn. Judging from the age when this happens, I find 25-26 years old a good typical time when this sudden and dramatic change happens.

If you lack the capacity to feel guilt or learn from experience, then you are beyond repair... and I won"t work with you.

Here are some of my courses and how they approach the issue:

• In the Soul Correction Workshop we identify a bunch of these...


• In the Instant Coherence Workshop (Aka Fall in love with yourself) we go further... and create a context inside which maturing is a must and it is self-directed


• In the Playground we map out the causes of the delusional behavior, and enlarge it such that actual emotional maturation can happen as a result of actually seeing... seeing yourself, seeing others, seeeing reality.


• In the Itch workshop we validate your energy source: wanting what you want... so you can use it to keep growing up.


• In the Learn to be detached... i.e. stay on the reality side of things, instead of jumping into the emotional dramatic side, I teach you and practice with you to activate that capacity.

PS: Here are 11 quotes from that same coach, Mike Litman

1. 
   

   You Don’t have to get it right, you just have to get it going.

   
   Procrastination is the silent killer. It keeps so many people from starting on their dreams. One of the biggest keys to success is getting started. Overcoming the inertia of inaction is the most difficult part. Give yourself permission to improve as you go, but first get going.


2. 
   

   Greatness starts by saying “Yes” to an opportunity

   
   So many people fail to take advantage of opportunities that could change the course of their lives because they’re afraid. Courage is taking action in spite of fear. Saying yes to something new and exciting can propel your life to a new level. Say, YES to new things that can move you forward


3. 
   

   For once in your life give yourself the gift of focus

   
   I’m currently using this quote as the mantra for building my communications company, Platform Giant. I’m doing a deep dive on the topic of personal branding. I’ve been reading, blogging and studying it almost exclusively to build my expertise. You can use this same idea to build your authority on any topic, if you’ll focus exclusively on that topic.


4. 
   

   The way to go BIG is to go small

   
   Sometimes we think we have to arrive at our dreams tomorrow and when we don’t get there, we give up and quit. Mike reminds us that the key to achieving our dreams is to improve just a little each day. He asks the question,
   
   “What would your life look like in a year if you improved just 1% per day?”


5. 
   

   Go where you’re celebrated, not where you’re tolerated

   
   You have to find your audience. You’re not going appeal to everyone. Quit trying to sell yourself to people who don’t appreciate you. Find or build a core group to build a community around your message.
   

   You’re not here for everyone, but you’re here for someone

   
   It is a crime and a travesty for you to keep your gifts to yourself. Not everyone is going to appreciate what you have to offer but someone will. Don’t worry about the 99 who aren’t into your message, focus on the one that is.


6. 
   

   You have to vote yourself in.

   
   This is crucial to all success. No one is going to tap you on the shoulder and tell you it’s your time. You have to vote yourself in to your dream. If you sit on the bench and wait, you’ll never get in the game. Stand up, put your helmet on and get in there.


7. 
   

   Never go to bed the same person you were when you woke up

   
   Learn something new everyday. Read something, extract a life lesson from something. Do something to move your life forward everyday.


8. 
   

   Every level of income demands a different YOU

   
   The person you were at $7/hr and the person you need to be at $50/hr or $100/hr are not the same. The skills, the mindset and the actions you must take are completely different. If you’re not happy with your income then go to work on becoming the kind of person who makes the income you want to have. You must study the mindsets of the people who are at the top levels of your industry or profession in order to have a shot of being where they are. Don’t hate the rich if you want to be rich, emulate them and how they think


9. 
   

   You can’t surpass the level of mediocrity you accept

   
   If you are willing to accept mediocrity in any area of your life, then you will never surpass mediocrity in that area. If you want to be excellent, then only accept excellence.


10. 
    

    You can’t attract what you don’t respect

    
    Whether it’s a million dollars or the love of your life, you must have respect and take care of whatever it is you want more of. If you don’t respect the money, I doubt more will show up in your life. If it does, it probably won’t stay.

How Can This Simple Exercise Be The Ticket To Happiness? To Achievement? To Passion?

I wrote this article more than four years ago. I assigned this simple exercise to about a hundred people, and to my dismay, all failed.

I discovered two days ago why... and now I can start teaching it again, and see if it is a lack of capacity, or a lack of intention that causes the failure.

Why am I so persistent in teaching something no one wants to do? Because, as you"ll find out, it is both a test and a spiritual practice that can take you to beingness, the dominion of heaven. I"ll add what I have newly discovered where it is needed, in italics and in the footnotes, below the article.


In this article I introduce a simple exercise that if you are willing to do, consistently, you will be able to accomplish a whole lot, probably more than any meditation program by itself. It does two things:

1. 
   
   
   
   • it takes you out of your head (what other exercise does that? Heh?) My bad: it turned out that getting out of your head requires a capacity in your DNA to be turned on, and most people don"t have it turned on... I can turn on the capacity for you. I also have a recorded workshop to teach you all the intricacies of that capacity: that capacity is the gatekeeper between being a human and being a human being. Available only this week...
     The Detached workshop teaches you to step back
   
   
   
   

• It gives you access to your major success instrument: your reticular activator. You"ve been using the reticular activator unconsciously forever, but you"ve been using it to fail. Now, with this exercise, you can start using it for your success.Turns out that the reticular activator only turns on if the matching of the target is non-verbal. And we are so used to give our "minds" verbal commands... no wonder it hasn"t worked! One of the brilliant things Maxwell Maltz and the Theater of your mind (psychocybernetics) method has is this... of course, the moment you introduce words, the magic is gone.
  
  By the same token, listen up! when you name the color in the color exercise, you are now looking for a word, not the color... and you are not doing the exercise... you are not turning on your reticular activator.Being wordless is hard... but doable... really! You just need to use your eyes... instead of your mind.

Interested? Keep reading...

The Famous Color Exercise... It Creates New Capacities In Your Plastic Brain

Here is an innocent-sounding exercise that can create new pathways in your plastic brain and enable you to catch stuff that is hidden from your view. You know the stuff that you don"t know that you don"t know... lol

If the above sentence doesn"t make sense to you now, don"t fret: it will, by the end of this article... you will just have to read it. Now we"ll see what you are made of, won"t we?

I saw a movie last week, DVD, called Gattaca. There is a sentence in it that is amazing: "There is no gene for the human spirit."

Which means that without a human spirit you can be smart as a whip, healthy as a bull, but you won"t amount to much.

Why? Because doing well takes the human spirit, and it is entirely up to you.

This is by design: it is part of this free will universe.

That was Vincent and then there is you: "You are the authority on what is not possible, aren"t you Irene? They"ve got you looking for any flaw, that after a while that"s all you see. For what it"s worth, I"m here to tell you that it is possible. It is possible."

Most of us are born with at least a small spark of that fighting spirit, that Life Force. Some of us allow our environment to extinguish it, some of us use controversy, hardship, insurmountable and impossible odds to fan that spark to grow it to a forest fire.

So when I said above that we"ll see what you are made of, this is what I meant. If you are a 300-lb weakling, a "I don"t like hard" type of person, you"ll quit before you start.

 This exercise, and everything I teach will encourage you to fan that human spirit fire: it is the only thing that you need to get anywhere you desire. But to get through it you will already need to have some of that fire going.

It is near impossible to breathe life into a dead body, a dead brain.

Connecting deeply, humbly, and long to Source will do it. But it won"t do it without you actively lifting yourself up in-between meditations. It can"t and won"t do it.

Now, with that said, let"s see what this famous innocent looking exercise is about and why it is one of the most important weapons in your arsenal against business-as-usual, dead, downward spiral of repeating bad stuff that"s getting worse as you get older.

OK, here is the exercise (you can also listen to the audio where I walk you through the process!):

[audioplayer file=http://evp-50116959de4b9-dd521b5ed563ee25508422182c681a30.s3.amazonaws.com/color-exercise.mp3]

Pick a color. Not the name of a color, but a color that you can find, right by you, that you can hold in your hand, look at in different lights. It can be on a book cover, a magazine cover, a catalog, a playing card, DVD cover, a recipe, a photograph.

Pick your color and stick with it.

Walk around with your sample of color in your hand, and alternately look at it and look at the environment. Compare without words. Use only your reticular (vision) center, not the mind.

Do it until you start to see the color everywhere.

If you named your color: you already screwed up: you involved the mind. Pick another color from an item, and start over. Start over until you can see that the color doesn"t have a name or description.

This part may take a long time, because of your mind"s desire to take over the exercise. But please remember: this is an exercise to get you out of the mind, not into the mind. Clear?

Spend some time and commit your color to memory. Find a color nearby, then compare the two colors to check your memory. You"ll see that this is not as easy as it sounds, without the mind. [note]Here is a test piece, to test if you are using the mind or not. The instruction? Find the matching symbols. If you are not going from left to right, sweeping the symbols, you are doing it from your mind.

This is so hard, I still do it 40-50 times a day... The mind is a persistent bugger...[/note]

When you are satisfied that you can identify the color in your environment then the second part of the exercise begins.

While driving, find occurrences of that same color on your way to work, to the market, or wherever you are driving to.

Do it as often and as long as you can.

This exercise will make physical changes in your brain enabling you to do stuff that is going to be essential to be able to change your life. These physical changes are called the "plastic change" in your brain. Your brain is able to change till the day you die. Even old dogs can learn new tricks, and it"s time for you to start learning something new. Something that is not designed to perpetuate the life you"ve been leading, but a life that is a higher vibration, brighter, happier and more successful with love and appreciation in it.

I hope you are ready. Now go and do it. I am rooting for you.

Are you REALLY procrastination? Podcast

http://evp-50116959de4b9-dd521b5ed563ee25508422182c681a30.s3.amazonaws.com/path-20130913-1.mp4
http://evp-50116959de4b9-dd521b5ed563ee25508422182c681a30.s3.amazonaws.com/path-20130913-1.mp3

In this podcast episode I spend 90 minutes to disappear all your misconceptions about what is procrastination and return you to sanity.

A great little exercise to cause self-love... Unconditional Love

Last night, in bed, I accidentally hugged myself.

Then, unexpectedly, I said to myself: I love you, little one. And then the "fun" began... The emotional dings, the doubt, the questioning, the grief.

Hoho... I said, what"s going on?

The little voice said: why would you love me?

Because I do... I said.

Do you love me, even though the house looks like a mess?

I don"t love your house, I love you. house, no house, mess, no mess... I love you.

oh. But do you love me even though I am getting old?


Oh, I do. And I want you to live long.

Sobbing... I didn"t know that the little self thought no one cared whether she lives or dies.... Some minutes pass. Hm. Very interesting.

And then, again...

And do you love me even though I have a missing tooth? That my legs hurt? That I am harsh? That I don"t have a lot of money?

It ended up with me, still hugging, falling asleep.

But I saw something, that I thought you"d also benefit from.

It was a big big surprise that the little self didn"t think anyone cared if she lived or died. That explains a lot of self-neglect, that until now has not made any sense. And it was always there, operating, sabotaging, working counter to what I was working for.

Then I woke up, and found my horoscope,

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): "I do not trust people who don"t love themselves and yet tell me, "I love you,"" said author Maya Angelou. She concludes: "There is an African saying: Be careful when a naked person offers you a shirt." With this in mind, I invite you to take inventory of the allies and relatives whose relationships are most important to you. How well do they love themselves?

Is there anything you could do to help them upgrade their love for themselves? If their self-love is lacking, what might you do to protect yourself from that problem?

Confirmation. I need to ask you to do this exercise.

Hug yourself. As intimately as possible. Hug yourself the way children hug themselves, close to the neck, close to the face. Bend your face into your arms, and have this same conversation.

The goal is to hear what the little one is considering a good enough reason not to be loved.

Then either put it in the comments section, or send me in email.

An unexamined life is not worth living... and until you see the small and the big you"s relationship is hampered by what the small you considers wrong, you"ll never be able to be one... you"ll always be schizophrenic, split, and full of anxiety.

Guaranteed.

Now go. Do it. Do it many times, if the communication is hampered between your selves.

If you have a hard time standing in the Big You, then consider that I am hugging you, and I say: "I love you".

See what it brings up. OK?

Good luck, have fun. Don"t be afraid to cry. Boys too...

PS: one more thing: if you have been taking the Unconditional Love Remedy, and you are not present to the grief between your two selves... you need to get present to it. It"s there. Weeping, sobbing... inside. You haven"t been attending to the most important person: you. This exercise will open up the communication, and also brings awareness to the big issue there. Don"t miss it.

A great little exercise to cause self-love... Unconditional Love

Last night, in bed, I accidentally hugged myself.

Then, unexpectedly, I said to myself: I love you, little one. And then the "fun" began... The emotional dings, the doubt, the questioning, the grief.

Hoho... I said, what"s going on?

The little voice said: why would you love me?

Because I do... I said.

Do you love me, even though the house looks like a mess?

I don"t love your house, I love you. house, no house, mess, no mess... I love you.

oh. But do you love me even though I am getting old?


Oh, I do. And I want you to live long.

Sobbing... I didn"t know that the little self thought no one cared whether she lives or dies.... Some minutes pass. Hm. Very interesting.

And then, again...

And do you love me even though I have a missing tooth? That my legs hurt? That I am harsh? That I don"t have a lot of money?

It ended up with me, still hugging, falling asleep.

But I saw something, that I thought you"d also benefit from.

It was a big big surprise that the little self didn"t think anyone cared if she lived or died. That explains a lot of self-neglect, that until now has not made any sense. And it was always there, operating, sabotaging, working counter to what I was working for.

Then I woke up, and found my horoscope,

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): "I do not trust people who don"t love themselves and yet tell me, "I love you,"" said author Maya Angelou. She concludes: "There is an African saying: Be careful when a naked person offers you a shirt." With this in mind, I invite you to take inventory of the allies and relatives whose relationships are most important to you. How well do they love themselves?

Is there anything you could do to help them upgrade their love for themselves? If their self-love is lacking, what might you do to protect yourself from that problem?

Confirmation. I need to ask you to do this exercise.

Hug yourself. As intimately as possible. Hug yourself the way children hug themselves, close to the neck, close to the face. Bend your face into your arms, and have this same conversation.

The goal is to hear what the little one is considering a good enough reason not to be loved.

Then either put it in the comments section, or send me in email.

An unexamined life is not worth living... and until you see the small and the big you"s relationship is hampered by what the small you considers wrong, you"ll never be able to be one... you"ll always be schizophrenic, split, and full of anxiety.

Guaranteed.

Now go. Do it. Do it many times, if the communication is hampered between your selves.

If you have a hard time standing in the Big You, then consider that I am hugging you, and I say: "I love you".

See what it brings up. OK?

Good luck, have fun. Don"t be afraid to cry. Boys too...

PS: one more thing: if you have been taking the Unconditional Love Remedy, and you are not present to the grief between your two selves... you need to get present to it. It"s there. Weeping, sobbing... inside. You haven"t been attending to the most important person: you. This exercise will open up the communication, and also brings awareness to the big issue there. Don"t miss it.

Simplicity... Elegance... Coherence... Ask a different question...

We tend to look at the world in black and white terms. This or the opposite...

You and me... ((

I have been struggling to increase my income for a long time.

This morning the question came up again, and it was, seeming opposites: make more money or die... I caught it. And remember to ask a different question. Not what is the opposite?... Not why? I asked a different question: What brings people to my site who buy, and what brings people to my site who don"t. 99% don"t buy. So what I advertise brings in non-buyers. But what do the people who buy come for?

They come for a solution to a problem they have. Mostly they want to feel better. And I have the perfect temporary solution, the Heaven on Earth. For quite some time it sold like hotcakes, on Amazon, and then, for some reason, I changed tactics... and my income suffered.))

But often what you think is the opposite is not...

My current favorite book, 46 rules of Genius, says:
"Rule 24 (of Genius)

"SIMPLIFY

"People tend to view simplicity and complexity as opposites. But this isn"t strictly true. The enemy of simplicity isn"t complexity, but disorder. And the enemy of complexity is also disorder.

• While complexity seeks order through addition,


• simplicity seeks order through subtraction.

"A goal of design is to drive out disorder by maximizing both simplicity and complexity. In most designed products, what we respond to best is a rich, layered experience (complexity) combined with ease of use, ease of understanding, or ease of purchase (simplicity).

"Most people have a built-in bias (preference) toward addition instead of subtraction. For some reason, the concept of “more” comes naturally to us. Yet the innovator knows that the value of any design doesn"t lie in how much is piled on, but how much is discarded.

More is more, but less is better.

This is, in essence, one of the secrets of the Anna Karenina Principle: All happy families are alike, all unhappy families are unhappy in their own way.

All good design are alike, all bad designs are bad in their own way.

All happy and productive lives are alike, all unhappy and unproductive lives are unhappy in their own way.

Many people live a life of disorder. Too many things are going on, too many irons in the fire, too many dreams, too many aspirations.

• One of the results is anxiety.


• Another is incoherence.


• Third is: you spend most of your time in your head.


• Fourth: you try multi-tasking, so you are performing with 75% of your intellect...


• Fifth: you are not happy.

I read an article today that attacks this issue, and provides valuable insights.

If it is true, as research says, that expectations effect happiness; that how your actual condition compares to what you expect based on comparison with your peers. If you are, by all objective measures, "worse off," than your neighbors, you may feel happier than someone who is better off but lives in an environment where they feel like everyone around them has more.

Comparing will do that to you... for better or for worse.

A peasant in China living in relative “poverty” may report being happier than someone who lives in a high class neighborhood who feels like they can barely keep up with their neighbors.

Of course you have to be the comparing type... you do that when you live on the horizontal plane, the competitive plane. I am poorer than anyone I know, but I am happy, because for me comparison is not valid. I am happy when I am happy with myself...

But if comparison were a good measure, I would want to live in a poor neighborhood.

So what does this mean to you? One major way to increase your life-satisfaction is to put comparison on your side.

When you strip away the nonessential elements of your life and focus on what really matters most, it"s a lot easier to feel content.

Here are two simple questions to ask that you ask to help simplify your life, and by extension, increase your happiness:

1. Do I have what I need?
2. Do I need what I want?

These two questions apply to everything from the physical (food, shelter, clothing) to the emotional (friendships, romantic involvement), to even the virtual (email, social media, digital entertainment). When you reflect on the various elements of your life (using these questions as a guide), you ensure that you are determining your expectations, and thus your happiness, and not those around you.

An additional benefit of answering these questions is that they prompt you to focus on and devote your energy on what matters most. Some people say: become a minimalist to be a maximalist. Doing so increases both fulfillment and performance.

In an age of more, more, and more, the more you declutter and simplify your life, the happier and better off you"ll be.

What is the enemy of spiritual growth? Disorder.

Personal, spiritual growth needs your life to be simplified. Otherwise it takes all your energy to just maintain the life you have, and there is no energy left for growth, or creativity.

I am sure you know what I am talking about.

I have been simplifying my life for a long time. I am not very good at it, it is a talent I am not blessed with. But I have counted, I can do laundry four times a year, and not have stinky clothes on me.

I know it sounds weird, but laundry takes a lot of time, time I can use to grow, to learn, to read, to practice, to empty my mind, to become a person who is about more than just surviving.

If disorder is the enemy of most of what you want, then disorder needs to be recognized...

Disorder is another word for incoherence. The hodge podge, all parts pull in a different direction: cacophony of your life.

What is coherence?

Coherence is simplicity and harmony. Where it becomes all easy... thinking, learning, sleeping, eating, problem solving.


The more stuff there is, the harder it is to attain coherence.

Water that had been mucked with, like chemically altered with reverse osmosis, treatment with ozone, made alkaline by adding chemicals, or made neutral by distilling, cannot be made coherent again.

Your mind, your body... the more "mucking" with it has happened the harder it will be to return to coherence.

Coherence is the blissful state where you are you and you are all you"ve got.

But you are enough. (Remember the incredibly inspiring statement of AL Williams? "All you can do is all you can do, and all you can do is enough"?)

What he didn"t say: this is true if who you are is coherent. If your actions are coherent. If your actions are directed to what is relevant and important.

Without coherence you are not enough.

Every program, every product, every meditation I have ever created is geared at making you coherent.

Why isn"t one simple solution, you ask? Because your life, inner and outer, is so complicated, that one simple solution cannot work, because...

Because you don"t know what to drop... to simplify.

You can only drop what is yours, your habits, your attitudes, you incessant talking, inside or out.

But that, is invisible to you, or if it isn"t, you are not astute about it, because you don"t have the vocabulary that would clue you in, what it really is.

Simplifying your life, inner and outer, often require you to be astute: so you cut out the irrelevant, not the shadow of it... the likeness of it.

When I watch, for example, people shop for the Bach Flower Remedies, I see that they have no idea what they feel, so they buy the wrong remedy.

For a long time, before I honed my ability to recognize feelings, I bought White Chestnut... and it didn"t help. The problem was somewhere else.

But I have found a solution to this problem by bundling up the now 41 Bach energies into what I call Heaven on Earth, and leapfrogging the issue of you not being able to identify what feeling is bothering you.

So whatever ails you is probably covered by the 41 Bach Energies... In the Heaven on Earth Remedy.

No poetry? No meaning. No inspiration. No coherence.

I am planning on doing an Instant Coherence Workshop, time TBA... to be announced to fit everyone.

And you get the 4 recordings of the previous workshops as a gift.

Most people need to attend this class over and over, to conquer yet another layer of their not-Self... that is covered up by the mundane stuff, that makes you who you are today.

Here is the link to be admitted to the workshop and while you wait watch or listen to the four webinars... a total of 8 hours.

Emotions are like firestorms, they cause incoherence, and are the most manipulated aspects of a human

The best way to examine whether emotions give you a reliable internal guidance system is looking at the flip side of emotions.

In emotional terms, for example, love"s opposite is hate, disgust, being appalled, repelled. But if you look at your emotions, these opposites are right there, right behind the emotion: love... They come together like the front of your hand and the back of your hand. You are in perpetual ambivalence, yoyo-ing back and forth, ups and downs, and incoherence.

Love, the one that vibrates at 525 or so, is not an emotion. Love is a commitment to love.

Love is a commitment to accept another human exactly the way they are and exactly the way they aren"t. Whether they do the right thing, love you back, chew their food with their mouth open, lower back the lid on the toilet, or leave the top off the tooth paste.

Commitment. Not a promise, a commitment.

No ifs, no buts, no conditions.

No action necessary, just acceptance.

No show of love, no giving till it hurts, no nice talk... those are not part of love, they are societal demands.


Love does not demand that you give. Doesn"t even demand that you support. Does not demand that you like... It only demands that you have room for what you don"t like. Accept it.

The emotion you call love is anything but a commitment, it is nature"s way to provide for the survival of the species, as best as it can. So the mother doesn"t abandon her child. So the child doesn"t do away with their parents.

Romantic love is a societal construct to dress up fornication as something loftier than it is: copulation. Once the female gets impregnated, the romantic love disappears: it has served its purpose... leaving the clueless couple dumbfounded: what happened to the love?

Everybody is trying to avoid the unpleasant emotions of fear, anger, anxiety, shame, regret, impatience and such, as if they were the enemy. But the truth is that those emotions are the flip side of the so called positive emotions.

When you live your life from emotion to emotion you are like a crazy person being jerked around by an insane firestorm inside.

Paying attention to the insane part of you is what renders you imbecile, out of control, low vibration, stupid, ineffective, unpleasant to be with, poor, sick and broke... and act irrationally, rush into things and then pull back, get excited and then procrastinate, and the countless back and forth things you do that make no sense.

Your emotions are the most unreliable guidance there is, and if you use them to guide you through life, I can be certain that you are miserable, low vibration, and mostly really moronic, no offense, intelligence is measurable, it is not just my opinion.

Feelings as guidance

I believe in me using my feelings as guidance, but when I say feelings, I don"t mean emotions, not even likes and dislikes.

I am a mainly kinesthetic person, I feel, touch, move, that is how I learn, that is how I experience the world. Like a dance, like a physical experience. You may be visual, and you experience your world as pictures that you watch. Or you may be auditory and you hear your way through life. Or you are the abstract: you experience life as mathematics, as music... abstract.

As a kinesthetic person (with secondary auditory), my internal guidance system is mainly feeling my way through life, like a blind person... and secondarily having entire sentences pop into my head, the auditory part, verbal, words, language. Then I muscle test if I am mislead or guided well... while connected to Source.

My feelings that I use are not emotional at all. They are physical, like a dance. They are physical like swimming. They are physical like flying.

...And in the rare instances that my emotions take over, I lose big time, I make big mistakes, and I miss tremendous opportunities.

We could also say that a life driven by emotion will be derailed by everything... the certain way to be an underachiever in life, for life.

When your vibration rises even to just 200, the capacity to bilocate [note]not identify yourself with your thoughts or with your emotions, instead identify yourself as the Observer or Witness[/note] your emotion will become less important to you and you will be able to see the bigger picture, and maybe even make intelligent decisions based on sound logic, sound thought processes.

You will be able to see that feeling inadequate, afraid, uncertain, unclear don"t have to stop you and wait for the emotions to change. You will be able to do the things that you fear and see for yourself if you were indeed inadequate. You"ll be surprised... which is yet another emotion.

That will be the day!

And as always, follow the path that takes you to a vibration of 200, get the harmonize, and the liquid remedies

PS: As I was looking for suitable images for this post, I found that most every teacher looks at emotions as if they were a valid indicator of a person"s consciousness, a person"s vibration. [note]the Abraham/Hicks emotional guidance system, Scientology"s tone of scale. Scientology says:

Every person has a chronic or habitual tone. He or she moves up or down the Tone Scale as he experiences success or failure. These are temporary, or acute, tone levels. A primary goal of Scientology is to raise a person’s chronic position on the Tone Scale

Scientologists believe it intends to classify people in a range or scale according to how spiritually alive and how dead a person is, both personally and in their relationships to others. It prescribes auditing procedures to use with a person depending where they are on the scale.

Here is the tone of scale from Scientology:
The tone scale is as follows:[1]
40.0 Serenity of beingness
30.0 Postulates
22.0 Games
20.0 Action
8.0 Exhilaration
6.0 Aesthetic
4.0 Enthusiasm
3.5 Cheerfulness
3.3 Strong interest
3.0 Conservatism
2.9 Mild interest
2.8 Contented
2.6 Disinterested
2.5 Boredom
2.4 Monotony
2.0 Antagonism
1.9 Hostility
1.8 Pain
1.5 Anger
1.4 Hate
1.3 Resentment
1.2 No sympathy
1.15 Unexpressed resentment
1.1 Covert hostility
1.02 Anxiety
1.0 Fear
0.98 Despair
0.96 Terror
0.94 Numb
0.9 Sympathy
0.8 Propitiation
0.5 Grief
0.375 Making amends
0.3 Undeserving
0.2 Self-abasement
0.1 Victim
0.07 Hopeless
0.05 Apathy
0.03 Useless
0.01 Dying
0.0 Body death
- 0.01 Failure
- 0.1 Pity
- 0.2 Shame
- 0.7 Accountable
- 1.0 Blame
- 1.3 Regret
- 1.5 Controlling bodies
- 2.2 Protecting bodies
- 3.0 Owning bodies
- 3.5 Approval from bodies
- 4.0 Needing bodies
- 5.0 Worshipping bodies
- 6.0 Sacrifice
- 8.0 Hiding
-10.0 Being objects
-20.0 Being nothing
-30.0 Can"t hide
-40.0 Total failure[/note]

But it is not a valid indicator. We all, on every level of vibration, have the full range of emotions. The difference between people of different level of vibration, of different levels of consciousness, is this:

1. are you stuck in any of those emotional states?


2. are you using the emotional state as a guidance for your actions or inaction?


3. do you spend time figuring out why you feel the way you feel?

The more of the time the answer to these questions is "yes", the lower your vibration, the lower your consciousness.

For example, if your vibration is 150, you spend 94% of your time in one or more of those three states above...

The goal is to observe, witness the emotions with mild curiosity, mild amusement, while you are doing what you need to do, what you are committed to doing in your life.

PPS: to confuse humans, some emotional states have the same names as the capacity: like contentment... it is both an emotion and a capacity. There is a big difference. If you consider it an emotion, it will make you want to maintain it, and do nothing to rock the boat. If you consider it a capacity, you can bring it about in any state it is going to balance what"s going on and what your expectation was: i.e. in moments of possible disappointment...

Being able to be (not feel!) content when things didn"t turn out is a high capacity, most don"t have.