You are machine... but not a stupid machine

Transformation is not a walk in the park... Because your machine, as a rule, prevents you from accurately seeing reality

Why? Because the invisible machine causes distortions in your perception of reality. Your machine shapes your interpretations, your meanings, and with your reaction to those, it shapes what other people will do...

This is where we are in the Playground...

The linchpin, the pin that holds it all together, is revealed.

You know what happens when the linchpin is pulled? Everything it held together falls apart.

It is the most dangerous moment in all transformational work.

If you can go through it with your eyes open, then you can go all the way to heaven... so to say.

For me it was in 1987 (could have been in 1985 when I got a first glimpse of it, but it was driven home in 1987) on the fourth day of the Forum.

The question we were asked to ponder was: "Who are you that you are?"

I raised my hand, and was called on (thank god). I said:" who I am is that I am afraid to go out into the world, I prefer to be a student and continue to pile up degree after degree."

The Forum Leader didn"t even bat an eye. He said: "Oh, I see, you are a failure."

This was towards the end of the session before the lunch break. Given that I had a history of instability, I promised to report to someone in the back of the room if I had an unexpected reaction to any of the course.

So I went and reported to the person in the back: "I am going to go out and kill myself in this break."

I felt like a proper victim... cried, and was determined to go through with it this time.

The person in the back of the room asked: OK, please explain what happened. I did. She said: are you sure you heard the right question and the right answer? I was sure... but when she asked me to repeat verbatim, I could see that while the question was "who are you that you are (for yourself)" I heard the Forum Leader"s answer as saying that I WAS failure, that I wasn"t a failure in my eyes, for myself, but in reality.

I heard my own "who I am that I am" echoed back at me, and there... I could not see myself continuing living.

But looking deeper and more precisely to what happened was exactly what I needed to start living a life where failure was normal... not a life sentence.

What I got in that conversation, was my first real glimpse at the machine and the way it distorts and twists my experience, what I hear, what I see happening.

Obviously a glimpse wasn"t enough to take me to heaven: I had to INTEGRATE that insight into my machine, in effect, design a new machine with brand new moves.

I have found that we, humans, have a very limited range of moves. And whether a move worked or not, we would have to bring curiosity and play to life... that would allow us to look at the results the moves produce, and evaluate them for what they were worth: working, hardly working, somewhat working, not working to the "end" we intended to accomplish with it.

My hunch is that the elusive "characteristic" of successful people is this playful, curious evaluation of different moves, so they are not limited to the few that got stuck and produce a predictable result of "not working".

Here is an example of one move I managed to play with... and cause a definite increase in my life satisfaction.

When I was young, I was regularly beaten by my mother. I decided that I wasn"t going to give her the satisfaction of seeing me hurt, of crying.

I never noticed that the less pain I showed the more savage the beating became.

I don"t remember how, but later, much later, I experimented with different moves.

For example, when I was angry, I started to say: "I am angry" and that arrested the movement of the machine... I was neither angry any more, nor the "abuser" continued to do what they were doing.

And then, even much later, I started to say: "Ugh, that hurt..." and that was even more effective in restoring "no abuse" without blaming anyone.

Had I been stuck at the first and only move: I won"t give them the satisfaction of seeing me hurt... I would have, still, the same victim life I had till I was about 50...

There are several decisions that limit the moves of the machine to the ones that never worked...

Our job is to bring play and curiosity to this phenomenon... and start designing a new life, a new life-experience, so Life can be fulfilled through us.

Obviously, at some point I "transformed" this "I am a failure" bit... that relegated me to never risking anything in life for fear of failure.

Play and curiosity creates a new context, inside which your life belongs to you... and if you don"t take care of you: who will?

Here is what has been the most important, and most politically incorrect guidance for me:

From Hillel, the elder, a poem from 2500 years ago:

If I am not for me, who is for me?
And if not now? when?
And if I am only for myself... who am I?

I don"t have a clear-cut one word for what kind of being that is, but
it"s been my guide, and when I "violate" it I am clear why I am
miserable: I caused it for myself. The world pulls against those three lines... strongly, persistently, and loudly. Be selfless, sacrifice your needs, that is what is good... blah blah blah.

Or it is not OK for you to what what you want... you should want what other people want you to have... sacrifice! Be good... blah blah blah

And out of those three lines grows my life... and out of those three
lines I work, I have fun, I enjoy what I enjoy, and have the courage
to tell hard truths to people... while also loving them.

How will you reclaim your life from the machine... one great way: handle just one feeling!

I wrote this article back in 2012. It talks about one of the most important invisible dynamics of the human condition... your homepage. I am republishing it to give you a fuller picture of this invisible dynamic... so crucial to your future, to your results, to you becoming an expanding human being.

Here is the original article:

I"ve been trying to teach a new way to connect to Source. It would give you a lot more control over your attention, over your connection, and a lot better results overall.

The difference would be the greatest in the speed with which you would incorporate the activators: instead of having to repeat them 10-20-30 times, just a few repetitions would get you the same amazing results.

I have made, so far, four attempts. Each more disappointing than the next.

This morning I woke up with a familiar feeling I haven"t been stuck with for quite some time: Devastated, hopeless, ready to throw in the towel.

In Transactional Analysis they called it your home address, I think.

Let me tell you a little story about me:

I left Hungary in 1982. Until that point I had read only one book on human beings and how human beings work. The book was called Empathy... the only thing I remember from that book is, that in spite of my upbringing "they" could not kill my empathic ability to see what people are thinking and feeling why pretending to think and feel differently.

I didn"t know it wasn"t just an ability, I didn"t know at the time I was a freaking full blown empath... grrr.

Anyway, when I arrived to Jerusalem, Israel as an immigrant, I spent a lot of time in used book stores. I was insatiable. I read about everything, and I wanted to try everything. I was like a kid in the candy store.



I read a book about expressing anger. I tried it... it wasn"t easy, let me tell you. And then I read the book "What do you say after you say hello?" And I absolutely loved it.

That is the book on TA, Transactional Analysis everyone read at the time, it was a bestseller... And the Games People Play... another by the same author.

Well, the method, Transactional Analysis, doesn"t really work that well, other than keeps you busy so you don"t have to live your life, lol, but it did something really useful: it helps you identify what is your steady, predictable response to everything, what is your default response, what is it that you say after you say Hello. I find it really useful now, 30 years later.

This is how this default response thing works: you do your life, however and whatever you do, and no matter what happens, you always end up feeling the same way. Independent of the situation, independent of what happens, you just feel the same way about yourself.

For me that default feeling is "devastated." All is lost. It is all over. There is no sense in doing anything...

Now, if I really look, I have a lot of creative ways to get to devastated, and I always end up there. Predictable, and quite unavoidable.

I used to think that feeling meant something.

It meant that:

• I don"t belong


• I was on borrowed time and will be thrown out/abandoned/discovered/or fail at any time now...


• I am unlovable

The feeling is identical to one of the Bach feelings, one of the Bach Energies, called Gentian: the discouragement flower.

It tells me to quit while I am ahead. It tells me to stop now, who I am kidding, it is only a matter of seconds before it will be clear for everyone that I can"t...

So, behind the confident demeanor, there is this totally different, certain-to-discarded-person...

Given all the work I have done on myself, I am lucky and I now expect it and recognize it. I asked my Self... the Observer, the Timeless part of me, to manage it. I could not ask it to be eliminated, it is impossible, but no matter what the feeling is, the response or reaction to it can be managed. The meaning can be managed. And your results in life will be strikingly different.

You have a default feeling like that... I mean a default homepage and a matching Bach Energy.

When we talk about climbing the evolutionary scale, (or climbing the Tree of Life,) one of the ways you can tell that you are succeeding, is the frequency with which this horrible feeling of yours visits you, unexpectedly, when things go well, when you need to make a change, take a risk... when it is the least useful.

Feelings and emotions are given to us as a guidance system. On a lower evolutionary level we think that the guidance system is smarter than us, that it can see more than us, and therefore we should always heed what it says.

I used to be a certified quitter. I had a hair-trigger for quitting, in fact. And in certain areas of my life I still struggle to take control: in the area of personal relationships.

Given my history of extreme abuse, I am mortally afraid of people and I have a hard time trusting. That is the core.

When you listen to me, you can often hear that I jump the gun, that I give up on people, write them off, call them names really fast, really easily.

But when you watch my behavior you can see that my Real Self is much more in control: I now seldom act consistent with the hair-trigger scared little girl I used to be.

Here is your assignment: start observing yourself. Observe your involuntary responses to any and all challenges. Start taking notes. Challenge yourself if you are willing. Try doing new things. Try taking a different route home. Get lost. Go to stores you don"t know. Ask sales assistants to help you. Watch yourself in these situations. TAKE NOTES!! Don"t rely on your memory!

At the end of the week count the different feelings that got triggered. If they don"t point to anything definitive, continue challenging and observing yourself and continue taking precise notes, until the picture becomes clear.

That Bach Energy, if you guessed right, is your "linchpin" energy. If you start to override that one, diligently, it will be the beginning of a new era for you.

Don"t expect the Heaven on Earth to do all the work. Why? Because my agreement with Source is that the Heaven on Earth will not do the work for you: after all the Original Agreement with Source was that we will earn our Light, or won"t get any. The Heaven on Earth will help you to not get stuck with a horrible feeling, but you will still feel it.

The way you earn your Light and rise in vibration is by using the Will of the Observer to override the lower self, the put together self, that is the MACHINE. It"s been running your life 98% of the time.

Just by taking back this small area, you can increase your dominance to 51% you and only 49% machine.

Make sure you have your remedy. Heaven on Earth. While it is freezing on the Northern Hemisphere, please only order the audio...

What else can you do?

Order your Bach Profile to find out what is your linchpin energy...

In addition to that, or maybe leading up to handling that, you"ll see what habitual ways you handle reality being the way it is... and what habitual ways you kill life, your life, your dreams, your aspirations.

Regularly this profile is $35, but for the readers of this article, I"ll do it for $25.



No analysis, just the profile. Analysis, if you need it, can be done for $250 in a private call. It is best if you do it for yourself.

All the Bach Energies are included in the HOE audio... But unless you really know how to use it, it may not do much for you.

I teach how to get the most out of any of my products in the webinar, called the Mustard Seed



Buy one or buy all...

What is the 91% linchpin that keeps your foot nailed to the floor? Can you guess?

My job is a lot like tuning a car... but a car that has 160 adjustable parts... like a human... not so easy...

I love the joke about the guy who brings his car to the mechanic because it doesn"t work properly. The mechanic opens the hood, listens to the motor running, goes to his toolbox, picks out a big hammer and hits the motor, and voila the noise stops.

Then he writes a bill for $500. 500 dollars? cries the customer? for one hit with the hammer? Oh, you want an itemized bill? No problem. says the mechanic, and writes: hit with a hammer: $1. Knowing where to hit: $499.

I am that mechanic.

All the problems are invisible to the naked eye, maybe even to an X-ray machine! So it"s taken me seven years to learn where to hit... $1... learning it, a lifetime of experience and expensive learning: $499.

The sticky part

The sticky part for 91% of all the issues is the about you measure, #11 in the Starting Point Measurements. ((Tai, who actually created the 67 steps cannot see the principle himself, because of his high "about me" score... that is why he is all over the place... entertaining but ineffective for most people...))

This is why?

Depending on that number, a large part of your cone of vision is occupied by you, yourself, so you can see mighty little of reality, mighty little of what is happening in the real world, for other people on whom your well-being depends, so you are simple rendered blind or sight-impaired, while you think you see everything.

One of the areas this shows up in is a fundamental human need: meeting the expectations of others. If you get that wrong, your life will be bad.

But...

But you are never told by other people what they expect of you, or rarely.

I asked five women on a recent Playground session if they ever told their children what you expect of them... and there was a unanimous "no, never" answer.

Then I asked if their parents ever told them what they expected of them: the same no answer.

So your children, you, are left to your own devices, watch for signs of approval and disapproval, largely oblivious that they may be having an upset stomach, or just remembered an argument, and the facial expression has nothing to do with you. Or the yelling, or sending you off to your grandmother... threatening you, or leaving you to sort it out in the street.

And then you live your life out of the wrong signals, desperately hoping that they won"t ostracize you, won"t abandon you, won"t throw you in the lion"s den.

This concern blocks your view of reality, and have one foot nailed to the floorboard... so you are screwed royally.

When people come to me to be trained, the first thing I notice is that they can"t tell, can"t recognize a principle, tell it apart from b.s. or some made up meme.

If you can"t see/hear the context, the principle, your vibration cannot be high, because you are interfacing with untruth, and your actions, and what you see will be limited to what you can see from a low vibration level in life.

I have a student who is always in self-protection mode, self-importance mode, so his vibration has been 100... very very very low.

Then I asked him to switch where he looks:

with regards to your father: before you talk to anyone, you ALWAYS have to set the context carefully… weighing what context will support the other person, not you.

You have been only considering context for yourself, and haven"t considered it for another: now your full time job is to consider the context for others, and if you didn"t, see what damage it"s caused.

and in another post I said:

And one thing: make sure you acknowledge the source of your knowledge, power, instead of saying: I did it myself, make sure that there is more from the knowledge/power came from and it won"t stop.

A lot of people don"t acknowledge source, and the real source of power dries out… it has happened to me, and I have seen it happen a lot.

both quotes say: look at somewhere other than where you normally look, yourself.

he reported a day later:

I"d like to acknowledge source: it wouldn"t have happened without Sophie"s recommendations and my talking to my accountability partner, or if I didn"t put some energy into it every day. Also, I wouldn"t have seen this if I didn"t look at the comments and struggle to get the answer to one of the questions there.

If you read his answer carefully, keeping the principle I gave him in mind, he gave about 30% credit to me and his accountability partner, and 70% to himself, so he didn"t do much of what I asked... he didn"t quite get the principle as a principle, he still had himself occupy almost his entire cone of vision (70%).

And yet, that little still quite stingy bit he was willing to give, raised his vibration from 100 to 130... and that level is still holding, just checked. And his about me measure dropped to 40%.

Obviously it is still high...

Truth be told nothing is about you in life. No one cares, no one even notices you are there... The number should be under 10%. Mine is 4%.

So there you have it. I now know, and you can know too, I just told you, where to hit with the hammer... so your life can start humming with life... instead of noise.

The exercises I give you remove the concern, remove the nail from your foot, and you can be up and running, dancing away... experiencing life, choice, and freedom.

No other methodology can do this... and, of course, that other type of methodology is all you can find. Change beliefs... type of stuff... not worth the price of the paper it is written on.

You are convinced that you are smarter than me...

I have been holding off on delivering the promised READING class... Why?

There are so many factors that control how much you can do with the instructions I give you, that it is hard to know what I can teach to make a difference...

When you read my articles, when you listen to me (or to anyone else, by the way!) you think that you got 100%, and you maybe even think that you are smarter than me... OK, it"s not a maybe. You think you are smarter than me. And that you know everything. ((I listened to step 67 in the 67 steps where Tai talks about a kid who has a toy business that nets 10 million dollars a year. He says: the kid may be smart, and maybe I am not as smart as he is... So maybe I am half as smart... so I"ll make five million dollars a year... Tai is not exempt from this phenomenon: he thinks he is smarter than everyone, because he doesn"t know what makes someone smart, so he cannot do deliberate practice to make himself smarter.))

How do I know you think you are smarter than me?

From your questions, from your requests.

Here is what you do that gives it away:

You ask me to muscle test things... but never ask me a question that would bring some clarity into your thinking. What got you where you are is the quality of your knowledge, the quality of your thinking. All within your power... but you accept and ask for no input from me... because, you know, she is just an empath, a tool.

So what makes one smarter than another?

The answer is simple: how much they see of reality accurately.

The measures in the Starting Point Measurements tell me all I need to know... but not to you, because you already know that you see everything, and you see it accurately.

Sigh...

• your relationship to feedback and instruction:


• The level of discomfort you are willing to allow w/o trying to fix it. This is your TLB score...


• The size of your vocabulary: the number of words you can use accurately:


• To what degree you think of yourself:


• how enslaved are you to memes? (what percentage of your life is run by memes?)


• do you have a bridge between your precious "I" and your actual I? What is your level of delusion


• How teachable/how coachable are you?


• The level of your awareness?


• the percentage of time you spend in the mind:


• the percentage of input that gets through to you.

These measures are all about how much you can see and how accurately.

But your delusional self, the one that fancies itself smarter than me... maybe not smart, but definitely smarter than me, will not allow you to hear that you and your results are below acceptable, and unless you increase how much you see and how accurately, you are stuck with where you are... no matter how much you argue with me.

One of the elements of getting those numbers better is what I intend to teach in the READING course. Maybe it is the linchpin element, that unless you get that under control, nothing will happen...

It"s been hard for me to see what it is I have done that allowed me to see more and to see all that more clearly than before.

The linchpin capacity is this:

Being able to hold your attention without narrowing your cone of vision

When you hear "focus" you narrow your cone of vision and block out everything that is outside.

It sounds like a good thing but it is really very bad for you, because it causes the fragmentation where you can"t see the context of what you see, and therefore it either doesn"t make sense, or it seems to mean something entirely different than what it actually means.

• Let"s say your focus is to make sure no one says anything bad about you, that you can maintain your delusion that you are smart... When you have a hammer everything looks like a nail... you"ll hear everything as a personal affront, a judgment, a slight, an attack.Your hammer will then activate and you cannot learn anything new, neither about yourself, nor about anything else.

When you can keep your cone of vision wide enough and deep enough, it is like having a tool box with all the tools a tool box can hold, and you can look and pick the tool that is a good match to the "issue"... learn from it, dance with it, try it out, experiment, take correction, and a lot more.

• Same with having the focus on understanding... narrow cone of vision, context is missing... and surprise, understanding will not happen.


• Same with "What"s in it for me?"... you won"t hear anything else, and you"ll even miss what"s in it for you.


• Same with the Desire Trap... you"ll hear that I am your enemy, or you"ll hear how you can jump and skip to a windfall without any process, any knowledge, any skills, any consideration, any plan, any work.


• Same with when you want me to be kind, nice, or whatever


• Same with when you want things to be so... and nothing less will satisfy you... it"s not fun? It"s not just so... Not easy? it is not just so... Doesn"t agree with what you believe? it is not just so...

With a penlight of attention you need someone else to direct your attention so you can now flash it on another tiny fragment of reality.

But something remarkable happens: when you have a narrow cone of vision, you never build a framework of knowledge that the new learning can be hung from.

You remain ignorant, fancying yourself smart.

And your life is a proof of it:

• you don"t tapdance to work,


• you don"t tapdance to the people in your life, and definitely


• don"t tapdance to looking in the mirror... because nothing is really magnificent, nothing is really up to your expectations.

Working with one of my students who volunteered to work with me, I managed to recall my many attempts to increase my reading speed AND retention.

Now... I never increased my reading speed. But I learned to control my cone of vision... the width...

I am still working on increasing the depth... the chesslike thinking part. Especially the willingness to do it.

My base nature is to jump without looking. Not pretty, is it? My patience is in short supply... but I am getting better, even dramatically better. It is deliberate practice: I do it every day, and the only purpose is to force myself to look before I leap, then look a little longer a little wider a little less impatiently.

I still have to do it with conscious competency: the unconscious competence, where I don"t have to think about it, is probably still far away. ((the stages of learning are: unconscious incompetence, conscious incompetence, conscious competence, unconscious competence. My job is to take you to conscious incompetence, or you"ll never learn anything: you believe you don"t have to. Once you are in conscious incompetence, I may be able to teach you something. But your "ego", your Precious "I" will not want to let go of the delusion that you already know everything you need, that you are smart enough. ))

So I am still getting smarter.

It"s all about how much of reality you see, the reality that is in front of you, and how accurately.

Your results will depend on that. And the quality of life as well.

Ignorance is bliss? Not in this day and age. It is bliss not for the ignorant, but for the puppeteers. Because ignorant people can be swayed this way and that... Because they can"t tell what they see...

Yet they think they are smarter than me, smarter than everyone.

No respect, no regard, no honor, no reverence, no appreciation.

You are the person who knows the price of everything but the value of nothing.

How is it working for you?

I posted this puzzle for you in a previous post, the difference between make do, or make it work.

The biggest difference is the mood it creates, the attitude it creates.

Your approach to life (attitude) is that you will make do... with less than what you deserve, less than what you should get. Settle for less, resigned, depressed, yearning, but inactive. You are the effect, not the cause. You are not getting enough, you are not loved enough, you are not happy enough, you don"t enjoy your work enough... not enough...

The second, make it work, is an active relationship to reality.

I live as if I lived in the woods with electricity, water, fast internet, and sewage. I don"t spend a lot of time making my environment just so... I leave it alone. I only care about taking care of what takes care of me.

Energizing my water, eating good quality food that matches perfectly what my body needs. Having enough opportunities to access the all-knowledge and also to teach it new things. And to practice the fundamental linchpin capacity that allows me to do a good job at it.

I also attend to exercising my body a little bit each day. To fill the birdbaths with fresh water so I can lift my eyes from my computer to watch the 40 different bird species that visit every day.

And I play the different activators around the house... so I can remain high vibration.

That"s it. I make my life work for me. I make my environment work for me: meaning: serve my needs. Fill me up so I never run on empty.