Telling the truth will set you free. The counter-intuitive path to happiness

Most people won"t adhere to a diet that would make them healthy.

Stupidity? Yes, stupidity on a very deep selfish gene level. ((The selfish gene is not interested in you being happy, fulfilled, feeling connected, or even healthy.

If you have been eating crap, and still can copulate, the selfish gene says: OK, he is alive, he can procreate, good. Let"s continue with the program.

If you have been a user, a taker, a parasite, never accomplishing anything... the selfish gene will say: good... Let"s continue with the program.

Some cultures call this the ego, but there is a basic and fundamental difference between these two: the ego does have energy, forceful and strong, that is pulling upwards... In the Tumbleweed article, Ego, the triangle sitting on its side is stronger than the "spirit" that is standing on its point, yet you need the strength of the "ego" triangle to get anywhere...

I even teach somewhere how to whisper to the ego to help you overcome the pull of the Selfish Gene that wants you to continue what keeps you miserable, small, and limited to a survival machine.))

It"s NOT that they don"t understand the price they are paying.

It"s that they make choices that the genes are making: not making waves, not bringing attention to themselves, not being different, fitting in is more important than being healthy, having energy, feeling good, calm, being intelligent.

Almost everything "social" is gene directed. I say "almost" because I am humble. I don"t know any social that is NOT gene directed, but there could be, maybe.

So what do the selfish genes want?

The genes want to survive, and they want to pass into a new generation.

Being liked, fitting in are important gene commands. So are "kill or avoid those that are different."

Racism, groupism, clickism, party-ism, are all gene based behaviors.

So is being henpecked, ((hen·peck
verb
(of a woman) continually criticize and give orders to (her husband or other male partner).
"henpecked husbands"
synonyms: browbeaten, downtrodden, bullied, dominated, subjugated, oppressed, intimidated; )) All married men are henpecked... and the exceptions only strengthen the rule.

Only when a man is able to consider their sex drive less important than their drive to do something with their lives, that they are able to grow in a marriage or in a relationship.

What do I want you to see?

I want you to see that the selfish gene is running your life to the degree you make sex and fitting in the main event, the main concern in your life.

I"d like you to self-select.

Decide, for now, if you are willing to give yourself to a life that is on a higher plane... even though socially you may suffer a bit. Decide if you are part of the one percent, or not.

If you are willing: you know what to do: with my help you can chart a winning path to yourself in all areas of your life, including social.

If you aren"t willing... no problem. You can stop kidding yourself. You can now see that all the high-falutin ((high·fa·lu·tin
?hif?"lo?otn/
adjective informal
adjective: highfalutin

(especially of speech, writing, or ideas) pompous or pretentious.
"you don"t want any highfalutin jargon")) ideas I write about are not for you. You can now see that you just want to feel better without having to change... I have "feel-better" tools for you, don"t fret.

But YOU need to decide for yourself. ((I used to kick people out from my programs, which means I was making a decision for them. I have stopped... Respect (I am still learning) demands that I let people decide for themselves...))

The worst thing you can do to yourself is maintain your narrative, your story, that you want to grow, that you want to become more, that you want to become an expanding human being... because we now know it will never happen.

Of course things can change: your spouse may leave you, they may die, or you may leave them... ((I have seen examples of this, both ways. One student, his wife left him, and he went back to drinking... and lost everything.

Another, his wife left him, and he recovered his mojo, his ambition, his joy, his drive... wonderful to work with him.))

Chances are that as long as your life does not change dramatically, you won"t have what it takes to take yourself and your life on... your chances for a life of growth are between zero and none.

You see, you can be the best you can be inside the limitations the genes give you... You can even make money, have fun, maybe even feel happy...

Because happiness is accepting how it is... Instead of fighting or resenting it.

Two days ago I ended three weeks of "not happy" state. Saturday I realized that I am not going to follow the business model I paid to learn... So I sent an email and canceled my payments.

I told myself and "them" the truth about it. I am not up for it... The program is about creating a big business, a business that is not the size of business I want to have. I prefer having 20-30 clients and give personal attention to them, than having hundreds or thousands customers who make me money but we won"t interact. Not what I want.

I know, I know... but trust me: having more money won"t make me happier. Having more money is not more important to me than my frequent and deep interactions with you.

I choose this over that. Choice: Selecting freely after consideration.

I watched my aversion to doing the work, even watching the videos... my stomach turned. I would rather have my eyes poked out... lol. I analyzed my behavior and allowed me to inform myself about what is not important to me... I gave it three whole weeks... An experiment that taught me a lot.

Staying enrolled in a program that my whole being says "no" to is horrible... I now know it first hand.

Staying enrolled in growth and evolution is the same for you if you want to live the life of the genes. Watch your resistance to it, watch your feelings... and you"ll know.

There is nothing wrong with you. The police won"t come and arrest you. Your friends won"t think less of you... on the contrary: they will applaud your courage and authenticity: the end of self-deception, the end of pretending.

And once you tell the truth, you can now start asking different questions:

• how do I become the best gene-driven person I can be? Or maybe:


• what can I be up to, what can I work towards that I will actually accomplish, inside the boundaries the genes set for me.

And you can stop duping and torturing yourself with memes and slogans and high aspirations: when you look and ask the right question:

Am I willing to do what it takes to be like that/do that? You"ll get an honest answer: Hell no. Not in a million years. By the way: the people who post those memes and slogans are 99% sure live in self-hate for pretending to be higher minded than they really are! Don"t be fooled. You are not alone... Far from it!

And it is all good. You can now live a life where you come from your strengths instead of your weaknesses.

You can live a life where you do what you do well, instead of trying to do what you say you "love"... What you say you love is a pretense. If you were good at it you would not love it, you"d be doing it, whether it felt good or not... and you would produce results. What you love and what you are good at would be the same activity.

There is nothing wrong with doing what you can do well, and stop dreaming about doing things you can"t.

AL Williams said it best: All you can do is all you can do. And all you can do is enough.

What he didn"t say: do what you can do, and it will be enough... inside the boundaries of what is important to you.

If going out to eat four times a week with your family is important to you, then pretending that you want to eat food that matches your body well is something that will make you despise yourself, hate yourself, put you in conflict with yourself. The pretending is the issue, not what you are doing.

If eating bread and almond butter you buy at Walmart for two meals a day... then don"t dream about having high health number: no chance.

You said you wanted to be healthy.

If you lied: tell the truth.

If you meant it: no food that has ingredients in it can be on your food list. None.

Because foods with ingredients are the Pandora"s box in the area of health... what you don"t see is what is killing you.

The truth will set you free. When you are telling the truth.

Free to be yourself, warts and all.

Should you become a client? Would I even accept you as a client?

For decades one of my sore spots was that people refused to serve me, even though I paid them.

I remember saying to myself: my money is not good enough for you? and wept.

I had no idea how I "accomplished" that... in 20/20 hindsight it is still a little spotty.

What wasn"t clear to me, never even occurred to me, how my attitude effected the service provider. My "To what degree you think of yourself:" starting point measure was, at the time, 70%. From my behavior I would have guessed it was higher.

Mainly I overrode what they said. I argued, I knew better, I acted with contempt...

What I didn"t know then is that being a service provider needs to be a win, or no service.

A customer who is not happy is a drag on an provider, and not worth the little (or even a lot of) money they pay.

I was that kind of customer...


By 1987 I started to see more of the invisible dynamic that was running my life, that kept me an angry victim, that made me feel entitled, etc.

With that my vibration rose, even without getting fully conscious and aware of how I used to be, my attitude changed, and life got better for me. Because no man is an island, and I did need help.

One of the most important criteria, it seems, is whether the provider is allowed to make a difference or not.

One of my measurements in the Starting Point Measurements [note]1. your vibration (1-1000):
2. your overall intelligence, emotional, intellectual, spiritual, body, relationship, etc.:
3. the number of spiritual capacities you have:
4. your soul correction (your machine): https://www.yourvibration.com/sc
5. do you have attachments?
6. the level of your health (1-100):
7. the level of your cell hydration (1-100):
8. your relationship to feedback and instruction:
9. The level of discomfort you are willing to allow w/o trying to fix it. This is your TLB score...
10. The size of your vocabulary: the number of words you can use accurately:
11. To what degree you think of yourself:
12. # of fixed mindset:
13. Ambition:
14. Desire:
15. Degree of inauthenticity overall:
16. Level of integrity 1-100:
17. how enslaved are you to memes? (what percentage of your life is run by memes?)
18. do you have a bridge between your precious "I" and your actual I? your level of delusion
19. Recommendations:

[/note] is your response, your attitude regarding feedback and instruction. I used to answer that with the category from a book I read: "smart, foolish, evil" but I abandoned that categorization: I didn"t like what I was getting.

I became more interested in what someone does when they don"t like the instruction or the feedback. A lot of people, after the initial emotional state, come back and do what they are asked to do...

If I can tell them: read this book and without justification, without explanation, they go and read it. They may feel reluctant, resistant, angry, but because I asked them they say: OK and do it.

In 1987, green and still with a huge attitude, I signed up a year long training program: Team, Management, Leadership. Why? I didn"t have any reason, I just liked to get trained.

Four of the five weekends of the of the course were in California. I remember sitting at the airports by myself: I was a lone ranger... unaware that my loneliness was a result of my own attitude... [note]That became conscious for me only some 20 years later, when I created a collage to deal with this seeming reality: I am alone. I wrote about it, I think, in another post. The top picture. (the bear on one side, on the top of a tree, and the multitude of penguins, and people, on the other side) is the collage that allowed me to see. And for the first time I managed to take responsibility for my reality. I am alone by choice. Duh.[/note]

One of the assignments from the program was to read the Science Fiction by Colin Wilson: The Mind Parasite.

I bought the book, it was maybe five bucks. And it took me a whole year to read it. I could get through 2-3 pages, and that was that. It was the hardest book I had read thus far. 10-15 new words on every page... It took me 20-30 minutes to get through 2-3 pages. But at some point efforting was replaced by genuine wonder. It was still work, but now it was discovery.

I found out that not many of the people in the program read it. But it counted for 4-5 years of instruction: learning something from fiction, from immersing in fiction, is incredibly effective.

Roy Williams says in today"s Monday Morning Memo, quoting

"Fiction is usually seen as escapist entertainment…But it"s hard to reconcile the escapist theory of fiction with the deep patterns we find in the art of storytelling… Our various fictional worlds are– on the whole– horrorscapes. Fiction may temporarily free us from our troubles, but it does so by ensnaring us in new sets of troubles– in imaginary worlds of struggle and stress and mortal woe… Fiction also seems to be more effective at changing beliefs than nonfiction, which is designed to persuade through argument and evidence. Studies show that when we read nonfiction, we read with our shields up. We are critical and skeptical. But when we are absorbed in a story, we drop our intellectual guard."
– Jonathan Gottschall

Today"s whole memo is to illustrate this idea... that story is real, immersive, and instructive.

I have learned a lot more from fiction than from training, from non-fiction, from coaching. And the cost of it was, of course, a lot lower.

On the other hand, I probably would not have learned that much from novels and maybe even movies had I not also learned distinctions from the more expensive, brainy activities of the other.

I have The Mind Parasites in the members area, and according to my statistics, my people haven"t been reading it.

Back in 1987, my accurate vocabulary measure in English was 700. Today it is 3500... With an accurate 700 vocabulary it was a difficult read. It is harder to read than most non-fiction, but because of the story, it is a lot more effective.

I am going to make a new rule: I won"t take on any new client who doesn"t, at least, attempt to read the book.

You don"t have to be a genius to become a client... if you don"t do what I ask you to do... I probably can"t help you.

Get rid of the memes... all of them are lies... Boys and girls, memes...

One of the most important principles in the 67 steps program is to get rid of a "truth" as often as you can.

No one hears it. No one does it. Why?

The mind says: why should I get rid of a piece of useful knowledge.

But here is the problem with "knowledge"... most knowledge you have is fabricated, with rendering you an effect... instead of cause. Rendering you unthinking... instead of making your own observations, testing, and real truth.

I question everything. And little by little, I get rid of stuff that has been declared true for centuries, often thousands of years.

Not a blanket rejection... No, that would be more of the same. No... on by one, investing work, thought, time.

I have a guy who likes to write comments on my site. His "knowledge", I just muscle tested, is 70% memes.

A meme is an untrue statement propagated as the truth.

Some people have their head filled more than others"... but we all believe some of them... get inspired by them, share it on social media... and other despicable activities.

All words. Males close with their mothers are especially harmed by all these words... Because the male brain is different from the female brain, in many ways.

I just watched a phenomenal TED talk by Mike Rowe, an actor who is in a TV show called Dirty Jobs.

Watch it. Maybe watch it a few times. It pierces quite a few manufactured memes... memes that make you unhappy, literally.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IRVdiHu1VCc

And if you are man enough, come back and share. Be willing to be a bumbling idiot... it"s your authentic self really.

Am I insulting you? No, not at all. I think being a bumbling idiot is a much higher consciousness state than the state you like to be in: be sure, feel knowledgeable, competent, etc.

Only to discover that you are full of sh*t.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q490iOW_-Lg

Now, here is the million dollar question: if you are already screwed up, if your brain isn"t working the way it was designed to work for you (my brain is not different!) then what can you do?

I am still in research mode about that... but I have found some pointers:

1. your eye brain coordination needs to be developed. In normal boy-type upbringing this would not be an issue... I climbed trees, and did lots of other boys activities... but you may just start out.

The EyeQ program with its exercises seems like a good choice.

And your intense craving to be approved of... My hunch that we"ll be able to pull that, like an attachment, in the Activate Divinity program.

Misery is the other choice... of course. You can always remain miserable.