Why getting well is so difficult for us, people without a Self

There is never a better time to experience what you experience, than right when you experience it.

This morning I was hit with a strong feeling of despair, loneliness.

I didn"t have time to hang out with it, I was in the middle of something. I wanted to shoo it away, and I also wanted to indulge in it.

But then I decided to just feel it, acknowledge it, and let it go. I paid attention to what it said... nodded, wept a little, and let it go.

Is this familiar to you? I didn"t think so. You don"t know who you are, and you don"t want to find out.
There are many reasons you don"t know yourself.
One of these reasons is that you resist your emotions.
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Friction is the ladder for growth

Chafing, strife, conflict is the condition inside which spiritual growth can be attained. Peace, quiet, silence is exactly the opposite condition, therefore no spiritual growth happens.

Just like a fire won"t become big fire unless it is bothered by winds, just like love will be a tepid business unless there is opposing energies, you won"t become the best you can be, unless you are willing to accept that strive, chafing, conflict, pain and suffering is the path.

You may not know it, but people "in the business" of spirituality do.

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Are you being used?

Lots of people, women and men, have a feeling that they are just placeholders or commodities for their friends or lovers.

Even coaches and gurus can have that feeling: actually this is what lead me to start this article.

Whenever I have a question about someone, or have time, I look up the online profiles of people that want to become a student of mine.

So I looked up someone today who has been a student, on and off for about two years now. I have had mixed feeling about her, so I looked her up.

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NEW: Existential Courage, taking risks, and what will be the most important turning point in your life

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One of the most important things I have ever done in my life is find out what really holds me back from taking risks.

After all, if you want to grow, as a person, as a business, you need to take risks: all power comes from going out of your comfort zone, and it"s a risk.

The kind of risk that causes you to grow is the kind of risk you need existential courage to face.

The other risk, existential risk, is annihilation of your physical body, but the kind of risk that causes growth is the kind that threatens to annihilate your self-image, your persona, to make you look bad, be wrong, be less than you desire to be.

So you can see, you have that kind of risk every step of the way, while the other, existential risk is rare and dull in comparison.

Let me return to the most important thing I have ever done, and that is: find out and own my biggest fear. Embrace it, if you wish... Love it, if you wish...

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