I am depleted. Where did my energy go?

I could say "I am depleted" as I have always said: I am running on empty. I could also say: I feel emotionally and intellectually empty. But like you, I can benefit from adding to my vocabulary of state-expressing words, and feeling-indicating words.

When I don"t feel energized, when I am not full of creativity and when I don"t have three new articles almost ready to write, when I don"t feel like I have new programs to launch, then eventually I start to wonder, maybe even worry.

It"s not like me to have nothing to say.

Why? What happened? Where did my energy go?

Of course I have more energy to start with than most: I eat well (91% well), I drink coherent water (only 40% because of all the hot beverages I crave during the day!), sleep well (50% because I wake up 3-4 times in the night), and yet, I feel empty and have nothing to say. ((

When your physical body is not taken care of, you experience your ambition diminish and your desire rise... (ambition is what you are willing to do for what you want, desire is what you want to get without your input). Most people discount this and they are not willing to do what they need to do to be well... so they turn to desire. Understandable, by the way, that when you can"t do, because you have no energy, you"ll fantasize about results... you can"t work towards.))

Yesterday"s article was one of my worst. And this after I just loaded up on the Days of Power energy... what is happening?

I am examining my activities minutely, and I zero in on listening to Dr Popper"s talks as the main culprit.

What about listening to a charming, charismatic psychologist"s talks is depleting me?

For one, it is in Hungarian.

The second reason is: I am listening for something, i.e. I have an agenda.

I have some new clients who need help, help I normally don"t offer. So I am listening to Popper to see what he would do...

And that, listening with an agenda, makes all my energies leak away.

It doesn"t make sense to the mind, after all I am listening to some fantastic talks... so it is not the talks. It is the agenda I have... or the agenda that has me?

It is not my nature to have an agenda, by the way. Even though I learned Photoreading, which is largely agenda driven, I never used it with an agenda. The biggest gifts I got from Photoreading are the Tangerine Method, and the fuzzy eyes and fuzzy brain method... that lead to, probably, the theta brain state. The gift I got is not the reading. That part feels forced and agenda driven.

So I avoid forceful anything that makes me feel my muscles in my shoulders and my arms tense... I hate it. I breathe and release the tension.

But I remember when some 50 years ago I was once in the library researching something for my architectural project, and entered this tense state and benefited nothing from the research.

What happens when one has an agenda? Not a purpose, purpose is not forceful. No. An agenda that is hurry, an agenda that is a must...

Oops, let"s not discount yesterday big "todo": my webhost"s server had a hiccup, and corrupted countless number of databases... including my site"s.

It happened at 7 am, and didn"t get repaired until 2 pm. I did have a "bridge" solution, took me hours to create... and in spite my best efforts, I was tense... but... I already didn"t have much to say before that event.

But I digress...

Let me explain what happens when one gets into hurry, one gets into forcing.

It is actually simple. Because there is no hurry on the vertical plane, the plane where life happens without resistance from you, life happens without demands from you, if you are in a hurry: you must have slid to the horizontal plane.

The horizontal plane is what most people live on. Full of complaints, full of disappointments, full of thwarted intention, unfulfilled expectations, undelivered communications.

I call it hell-on-earth, most people call it life.

I used to be in deadline driven occupations. An architect always has a deadline. A magazine publisher always has a publication date.

Today the only deadline I have is the first of the month: rent is due. I have lived in the same apartment for 16 years now, so my landlord is somewhat flexible, but it is still difficult to stay loose and relaxed when the money just isn"t there.

And being tense doesn"t help... especially because it depletes me of creativity. I notice holding my breath. I notice that even when I want to, the breath doesn"t go deep: as if I had a blockage below my breasts.

I expect trouble. Not fear. Not anxiety. Not anguish. Interesting. I just checked, and it is not represented in the Bach Energies, so maybe it is time to ask for a precise energy that can release that tension. Let me do that now...

I"ll call that energy Liana, the energy of the plant that climbs by winding itself about a support or holding fast with tendrils or claspers. I could call it the boa constrictor, but I want to stay with plants... The energy is willing to kill the thing it climbs on, for its own purposes.

OK, Source gave it to me... I"ll be adding it to the Heaven on Earth as the 41st energy... I will record myself downloading the Liana, and you can buy the audio... a single energy.

Get The new Bach Energy: Liana

I am noticing, it also releases the neck and the arms. Nice.

In reality (not MY reality as some of my students talk about it, no, in real reality) anything that you forcefully pursue, anything that you chase, even anything that you seek, flies from you, escapes you. Happiness, riches, results.

You need to fall in step with life, relax into it, and then you can have anything you have the talent, the skills, the process to get. NOT attract. I don"t believe in attraction.

One could say that attraction is a positive thinking concept: the truth is more like anything you don"t repel.

Most things you want you repel. Wanting is forceful.

One thing the movie Julie and Julia got wrong, very wrong, is the onion chopping segment.

Julia Childs would not have been hellbent like it is depicted in the movie. She would have been diligent, tireless, ambitions, but not hellbent like Merryl Streep played it.

How do I know? I have watches some of her videos on youtube, and it is out of character for her to get her panties up in a twist, to become overly upset or emotional over something, especially that which is trivial or unimportant.

I chop onions every day. Doing it too fast gets my panties up in a twist... lol... so I do them fast, but not too fast.

It is possible to do things fast without hurry. It is possible to even run and not be in a hurry. Hurry is an internal state. Wanting it to be over with... instead of being where you are.

A person who is running but isn"t in a hurry is present to the pleasant (or painful) feelings in their body, the way the feet touch the floor, etc.

In a world that is in a deadly rush, it takes character, maybe even courage, to remain loose, present, be here and now.

I go grocery shopping on Wednesdays with a bunch of old folks, like myself. I take my kindle with me, and sit on a bench far from them, because the van comes back to pick us up about 90 minutes after i finish my shopping.

I don"t want to sit with the other people, because they are tense: they want to be somewhere else... In a hurry. I, on the other hand, peacefully read my book, comfortable, nothing better to do. Lovely.

I observe my students always have an agenda. Always keep their eyes on what isn"t... and not what is.

The secret of the process thinking is directing your attention to what is, and not what isn"t. You are doing something... and that is what is. Reading, talking, cooking, sitting, driving. What isn"t isn"t...

The main purpose of my Playground program is to train this simple move from what isn"t to what is.

From unreality to reality.

All the invisible dynamics are the many different ways to look at the mind, the machine, to take you out of reality into unreality: your agenda that can be thwarted intention, your expectations, etc... all the things that aren"t.

The past isn"t real: it isn"t. The future isn"t real: it isn"t. The only thing that is real is what is, this moment and this moment and this moment.

If you are able to let go of the suffocating, urgent, squeezing need to get what you want, you won"t need the Liana energy.

But, so far, it seems that it is the hardest thing for a human to do.

Some people even force "allowing" or "acceptance"... which is an oxymoron, for sure.

Allowing and acceptance are letting go, cannot be forced.

Just like some students force breathing... Some people force everything... lol.

No joy, no fulfillment, no serenity is possible in that tense state. None.

Just the opposite of what you wanted, isn"t it?

One more thing: laughter, real laughter, also releases that tension...

Updated: Soul Correction: Finish What You Start

Soul Correction: Finish What You Start

Update 7/10/2016:

The archetype is the flatterer scam artist. If you are their victim: They will hook you with their compliments, flattery, while suck you dry, take you for your last dime, without ever caring about you, and without ever delivering on what they said they would do.

If you are the person with this soul correction: You find yourself with projects half started, never finished. You find yourself getting enough satisfaction out of buying a self-improvement program, but you don"t actually listen to it or use it.

Your self-image is "insignificant." Maybe even weak, inconsequential, not important. Or you suffer from delusions of grandeur: you are or should be the best the best looking, the smartest, a hero... except that you are literally unwilling to do the work to make it happen... What"s in the way is that pesky "should already" be that. Or "it should be easy for me, even if it is hard for others"

You instinctively know who is a sucker, and you latch onto them. I must be a sucker: you are attracted to me... Why? How? I am sensitive to your flattery... that is MY weakness, and you know it.

It"s all a game.

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Become an Expanding human being aka living an interesting life

I am reading one of my all time favorite books. Again. I was guided to read it again. As I have been guided to watch everything I watch, read everything I read.

Sometimes the key to the insight is on page 800 of a book, or in episode 60 of a Netflix series.

The tricks are: trust, don"t be in a hurry, don"t expect the "key" to be a direct answer, and once you have what you were needing, acknowledge it.

This book is full of clues for me. Clues for why you are living a life of quiet desperation, why you don"t live an interesting life.

The book is about a little girl who gets an interactive smart book, to teach her life. ((Neal Stephenson: The Diamond Age, in my subscribers only area in pdf, kindle, and epub format.))

She is four years old when she gets the book.

Download the pdf version of this article at the end of the article

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Abilities that are not available until your health number is above 50%

When you are not well, you are in survival mode. Everything is an is, and the questions you ask are from that "is".

When you are well, you can start to ask different questions, that widen your cone of vision, that deepen your field of depth perception.

Questions like:

What am I missing here? What else could I/should I be asking?
What am I not looking at? What is outside of my survival, business as usual narrow cone of vision?

But there is a caveat: Even after people getting healthy or healthier (above 50%), changing habits, even though you can, doesn"t come naturally.



Survival mode is most recognized by the narrow cone of vision.

Download the pdf version of this article at the end of the article


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What you value and in what order... why you are off... and why you are unhappy, unfulfilled, living a meaningless life

A lot of why"s are answered here... why you can"t get well, why you are not happy, etc.

People are the highest value in the universe. Why? Because they are able to be all levels of values, the thinking mind (systemic), the extrinsic (create tools, cook food, provide pleasure), and the intrinsic.

You live, predominantly on one level, and value what is on that level most.

Depending on how closely your valuation matches the valuation that is "godly", or the Original Design, you fulfill the purpose of being human.
Download the pdf version of this article at the end of the article

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Can you raise your IQ by getting healthy?

Lots of people are searching the internet for ways to get smarter.

All the programs, and all the supplements that are out there are symptomatic treatment... and not worth a lot.

As I am going through my own program, and I am a totally aware person, and can muscle test and get answers right away... I am a testing laboratory.

I have been noticing brain or cognitive function symptoms the past two days: as if I were disoriented... it feels now every day that it"s Sunday... lol.

Download the pdf version of this article at the end of the article

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Religion, smart Jews, and being a good person... what do spiritual capacities have to do with it?

This article is politically incorrect, and somewhat philosophical...

Not up for it? Spare yourself frustration, and don"t read it.

OK... now that only the eleven or so readers that are up for it remain reading, I can be blunt, and use some six letter words... lol.

Of course, this is, at least partially tongue in cheek...

OK, I am going to, first talk about a new insight I have on religion, then about Jews, capacities, genetically smarter... and other politically incorrect subjects that are keeping me busy pondering today.
Download the pdf version of this article at the end of the article

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You are in trouble... And you don"t know that you don"t know that you are in trouble

One of the most educational experiences is to listen in to Dr Wallach"s radio show.

It"s on youtube. But before you rush, let me tell you what to listen for.

People ask about a disease. A problem. Although Dr. Wallach"s approach is not disease+fixing directed, he needed to learn how to ask questions that drive up the actual nutritional deficiency issues, so he can address the underlying deficiency, instead of providing a fix that makes no difference.
One question he repeatedly asks and a question that seems totally irrelevant, is this: Was there childhood rash? ((
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RmWTLmCqpHI&list=PLhEsUt1QY8ndXofeeUevvN4GFL0GbWsyg&index=12))He also asks, repeatedly about childhood asthma.

I have been pondering these two questions, and I finally cracked the mystery with regards to one of them: the rash, and I am starting to see the relevance of asthma.

Download the pdf version of this article at the end of the article

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Why is rape so traumatic, while sex is so commonplace?

Why is rape so traumatic, while sex is so commonplace?
Why is slave labor so traumatic, while working is so natural to us.

If you have ever been pinned down, not able to free yourself...
If you have ever been forced to do something you didn"t want to do... anything...

...your trust of life, your trust in people, your confidence has dealt a big blow.

Recovering is not guaranteed, and the wound can be torn open again quite easily.

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You live in a world of your own design

You live in a world of your own design. And you create the world with your beingness.

We think that beingness is all good... But beingness is neutral. It doesn"t take sides. There is a beingness for everything, including greed, jealousy, and puniness... if that"s a word.

But whatever that beingess is, when you realize it, when you pinpoint it, you"ll immediately see that it actually created your current reality, and if you don"t do something about it... it will create the rest of your life that same...

But as a human you have access to creating any kind of beingness... you have difficulty in holding onto it. But yet, you can start. Any time, any day, any age. And increase your capacity to hold onto the beingness, honor it as yourself.

One of the beingnesses we are really familiar with is BEING judgmental. Or the flip side of it (they always go together, like the two sides of the coin!) BEING judged.

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Are mind movies and vision boards useful? Are they mental representation?

Yes. Mind movies and vision boards are a mental representation of some fancy that you have... creative or not so creative visualization. Low vibration, low consciousness, wishful thinking stuff. ((It is created for people and bought by people who have no business to use it, because it only increases their misery, their sense of inferiority. Why? Because mind movies and vision boards are based on a false theory, that if you really really really want something, then it will move towards you. But as an empath, I can tell you with certainty, that exactly the opposite is true. The really wanting is actually blocking what you want, it is blocking life force, and keeps you unable to act on what you want... mostly because you have no idea what to do, because a mind movie shows you no path to achieve what you want.))

So what is the difference between a blueprint and a vision board/mind movie?
What is the difference between an action plan and a mind movie?

The main difference is how realistic the "dream" is... how much of the groundwork is done and already in place.

Download the pdf version of this article at the end of the article

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Do you feel banged up? By life, by people? Listen up!

When Tai asks you, what is in the way of you growing, and starting to live the good life, most people have a ready answer. An answer they are sure is true. And an answer that they had seen a million times.

What no one seems to consider, that the saying "how you do anything is how you do everything" is more of a reason than you would consider.

One of them shows up an awful lot on my site: assuming to know. That is a how... falsely certain.

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Can I, should I train you to do DNA activations for your family, friends?

Someone asked in a comment if I could train other people to do what I do, connect to Source on the 3rd level where you can channel the energy, the specific energy to cause something, like activating a DNA capacity.

This question is like the tip of the iceberg... it shows the world view from where the question came from.

The world view is: anyone with enough training could do anything.

Is that true? After all other people have opened healing schools, trained teachers, trained practitioners, trained coaches.

I am familiar with Landmark Education"s training programs. They train coaches, introduction leaders, seminar leaders.

They screen the applicants. The programs are rigorous, some even murderous.

Results: no good coaches, no good leaders, or not really. There are exceptions, but rare.

Why is that?

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#DNAactivation

More vibrational reviews: is she an empath? is she a psychic? is she a witch? Rose Rosetree a secnd view

A client came had his attachments pulled in March. He came back after seven months for a checup. His vibration dropped 60 points.

I checked him for attachments, and he had nine, two of them healer attachments.

These are the people he bought classes from, or watched their videos.



1. Henna Datta, the wealth alchemist: personal vibration: 100.

2. Kristeanna Alfonso: "psychic" Personal vibration: 70

3. Belinda Davidson: personal vibration: 130. powerful dark energies. casts darks attachments on you

4. Michelle Lowbridge: erase money blocks... personal vibration: 160

5. Andrrea Hess personal vibration: 120

6. Teresa Dietz: can"t find her

7. Rose Rosetree Personal vibration: 170. even her videos distribute attachments. beware. the attachment on your forehead is from her. By the way, she calls herself an empath, but empaths connect without an energy cord... so she isn"t an empath. She is a witch... of the worst kind.

He asked how he could avoid getting more attachments in the future. I recommended that he asks me first... but given his attraction to low vibration people I don"t think I can hold him back: he is attracted to Dark Side, to shadow.
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#VibrationalReviews

Let"s talk a little bit of what would make you first want to participate with me, buy stuff, and then go away?

What attracts you to me and my site is hope. And what takes you away is also hope.

Hope is a state where you don"t accept the way it is, you, others, the world, and you are looking for some light that others promise, that others seem to get, but not you.

You base hope on the view you have of others.

Hope also signifies a state where all needs to come from the outside, because you"re sure don"t have it.

You are like a moth being attracted to any light, even if it is fire that burns it.

I got a vibrational measurement request from a client. His vibration dropped 70 points. I checked and he has nine attachments. I have already pulled attachments from him, but he went and got himself nine more, some of those are those infectious attachments you get from healers, energy movers like Christie Marie Sheldon, from practitioners of the Access Consciousness Bars method, and lots more I haven"t identified yet.

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#Raiseyourvibration

The anatomy of missing the mark

Have you been wondering why public services and big companies employ semi-morons for customer service?

I am, I think, supposed to mention this, given how many times it has happened in the past week.

Not every customer service person acts stupid, only most of them.

So what is their stupidity about? They only hear what they know. The filter of their mind screens out everything that is not the three-four basic issues: refund request, payment plan request, return request... you know the kind most people will have.

For every issue outside of the ones that the solution is standardized, the customer rep can"t hear...

The mind did not allow the person to interact with reality, only with what"s in the mind.



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#SpiritualPractice

Your invisible heroes... a guidance from fiction: books, movies, plays

I read today"s Monday Morning Memo, as usual, and it made me look. (())

Who are my favorite fictional characters?

At first I looked at the ones that weren"t supposed to survive, weren"t supposed to succeed, because they paralleled my own life experience.

But their influence on the multitudes was minimal, because they were about themselves, or maybe about one other person... and I saw that I have grown beyond that path. I have grown beyond the little Chinese boy"s character, my favorite as a child. I have grown beyond the deaf and blind yet dutiful character of Helen Keller, another favorite character of mine from childhood. I have even grown beyond "Socrates", the orphan boy that became the Peaceful warrior in Dan Millman"s books. The little girl in the movie "King of Masks" or BianLian. that you can watch in the subscribers" area of my site.

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#ExpandingHumanBeing

Intellect, iq, smarts, intelligence... and the ability to raise your vibration...

We need to have a conversation about intellect, iq, smarts, intelligence... and the ability to raise your vibration...

There IS a connection.

You have what you have... as much or as little as you do.

Just like in everything, how you use what you have that matters.

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#attitudes

More on fitness and vibration... using my own example

You may need to do a lot of preparation work before you can start doing the work in earnest

As I said, raising your vibration is like fitness. ((Your IQ, as in intelligence, is also like fitness. The difference is that you can raise your fitness in one lifetime, but you cannot raise your intelligence in one lifetime.

Certain ethnic groups have been focusing on intelligence, understanding, mostly.

Other ethnic groups focus on fitness, speed, endurance, strength.

And yet other ethnic groups focus on survival, easy life.))

Vibration is like fitness: no matter your ethnicity, no matter your starting point, you can raise it.

In this article I will share my fitness story, and we"ll see if I have something to teach you with that... lol.
Ok my fitness story: I am, genetically predisposed to be weak in body and strong in intellect.
As with everything, I refused to obey the weaknesses: I did sports: the kind of sports that didn"t require me to run, or throw something. Why not those? Because I have physical limitations from birth or from abuse: I don"t know and I don"t care.

So I was a swimmer, I payed table tennis, I was a gymnast (uneven bars) competitively.

When is was in university, I walked for hours; I didn"t have time to compete.
I was still relatively fit till I got myself a car...
Then I did the "pill popping" thing I mention in my previous article, and it seemed that fitness was over for me: even climbing the one flight ((I live on the second floor)) made me hurt so much, I had to sit down.

This past spring I asked Source if I could live in Italy or France. I have been craving seeing more.

The answer was yes/no... the reason for the no is that I can"t walk without pain.

OK, now, listen up! My whole father"s side of the family has pain in the legs and the hips from walking. But my father walked every day till the day he died at 80... and if he could do it, you can bet your sweet ass I can do it... lol.
So I started to walk. I have been walking every day since June.
And this week I have started to use my stair stepper: Tony Little Rock and roll stepper that I bought on Amazon, used, October 25, 2013, two years ago.

I didn"t use it all those years, because I needed to build up to using it.

I am ready, and I have been using since Tuesday.

Today I decided to connect drinking tea and using the stepper.

Every time I make tea for myself, I set it to brew, I set the kitchen timer, and go and step on the stepper, until I hurt... a lot. I did it six times yesterday. Six cups of tea, six times I stepped on the stepper. Today I have already done three times. Building strength, building stamina, 90 seconds at a time. This is not the first time: when I used to work in offices, 30+ years ago, I used to use the bathroom of another floor to force myself to run up and down every time... and it worked then, I know it will work now. 30-60 steps 10 times a day... easy peasy... just a little painful.

It is 90
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Vibration is like fitness: if what you are doing is not painful, it will not raise your vibration

Everybody is looking for the easy, take a pill type of solution to life"s issues: fitness, relationships, money, raising your vibration.

One of my students has been coming back to the same article, over and over again, several times a day, because to him it seems like an instant, pop a pill type of solution to raising your vibration.

The truth is that pop a pill type of solutions either don"t work, or work counter to your intention.
Fitness is the easiest to see because it is visible... the others: it isn"t quite obvious
If you take a pill... you"ll not get fit. If it works and you lose weight, it probably caused damage, just ask me. I won"t say it publicly, but I did that and it has caused probably irreparable damage... I am still working to repair it.

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